Monday, December 15, 2008

My thoughts about Fortune Cookie messages

Welcome,

I've often thought that fortune cookie insert writers have the best job in the world. Not only do they get to make up stuff, but a good percentage of people who read them, tend to believe what they read. What a chance to inspire! What power! Any ambiguous or nonsensical positive statement would suddenly become a person's carefully hoarded secret power to carry them past obvious slights and through the mundane.

I could write something nasty, say: Your boyfriend was right, you do need plastic surgery or Yes, she was telling the truth, you aren't that great. If I'm in a good mood, I could say: Your inner beauty shines brighter than the sun, You are hotter than Saturn, or Someone admires you.

Here is what I would write today if I were to insert a message into a cookie and serve it today:

Hot tea and a warm fire would bring you comfort today.

Nothing to contradict common sense, but because it was in a fortune cookie, someone somewhere would act on my advice. I wonder what would happen if that cookie was served in the middle of summer?

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